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If risque' material might possibly offend you in any way, please hit your browser's back button now, thank you!
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Below is a collection of jokes about contractors of all
stripes, not just mechanical or plumbing ones, gleaned from
various and sundry sources. New jokes are apt to be placed in the pile in a random order, so please check the whole stack from time to time to read the new ones~~~Kent
Top Ten Books You Won't See On Any Contractor's Bookshelf
How To Win Friends & Influence People, Carnegie
Winning Through Integrity, Jones
In Search Of Honor ~ Lessons From Workers On How To Build Trust, Lynn
Living As Equals, Barker
Brutal Bosses and Their Prey: How To Identify and Overcome Abuse In The Workplace, Hornstein
Business Ethics, Grace, Cohen
Managing With A Heart, Good
The Moral Foundations Of Business Practice, Wilbur
On Becoming A Servant-Leader, Greenleaf
1001 Ways To Reward Employees, Nelson, Blanchard
B U M P E R S T I
C K E R
Grow your own dope ~ Plant a general contractor
From: boilerguy@spammerssuck.net (Scott Betts)
Date: Thu, 8 Oct 1998 22:40:31 -0500 (CDT)
To: kent@hkentcraig.com
Subject: Engineer Hell
I saw your URL in alt.hvac tonight and I'm still laughing my ass off at some of the jokes.
Maybe you can use this one:
-----------------------------------------------
An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, "Ah, you're an engineer, you're in the wrong place."
So the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements.
After a while, they've got air conditioning, flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is becoming a pretty popular guy.
One day God calls Satan up on the telephone and asks with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in hell?" Satan replies, "Hey, things are going great. We've got air conditioning, flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."
God replies, "What??? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake he should never have gotten down there; send him up here." Satan says, "No way! I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him." God says, "Send him back up here or I'll sue."
Satan laughs uproariously and answers, "Yeah right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"
Praying
The Catholic Church's air conditioning broke down, so they had to hire a man to crawl around in the ducts and figure out what was wrong. As the man peeked down through one of the vents in the sanctuary, he saw little old Mrs. Murphy kneeling by the altar, apparently saying her rosary.
Since the man was a fundamental Baptist, he thought it'd be funny to try and mess with the lady's mind. In his best authoritative voice, he said, "This is Jesus. Your prayers will be answered."
The little old lady didn't even blink, just kept on saying her prayers. The man decided maybe she didn't hear him, and tried again. "This is Jesus, the Son of God! Your prayers will be answered!"
Again, she didn't react at all. Mustering up a big breath of air, the man decided to try again. "THIS IS JESUS CHRIST, THE SON OF GOD! YOUR PRAYERS WILL BE ANSWERED!"
The lady looks up and says, "SHUT UP! I'M TALKING TO YOUR MOTHER!"
Date: Fri, 08 Jan 1999 16:42:29 -0500
From: George Fisher wuff@nopsam.net
To: kent@hkentcraig.com
Subject: (no subject)
A contractor was building a garage on a house. The owner's little boy who was about four years old was there watching the contractor as the work progressed. Every time the contractor got a tool from his toolbox, the little boy would say his daddy had two of them.
The contractor would get a saw out, a hammer out, a jackplane out, etc., and the little boy would say, "my daddy's got two of those", so after a couple of hours of this, the old man was getting a little tired of it.
Finally the contractor had to relieve himself, so walking over to the woods and getting behind a large tree, he starts to take a piss. He looks up at the little boy who followed him into the woods and said "I guess your going to tell me your daddy's got two of these".
The little boy says "no, but the one he has will make two of yours".
George Fisher
Fruitland, Md.
A contractor was making love to his wife, but his mind was on other things, worrying about business and employees and the like; his eyes wandered around the room and looked to be a million miles away as he limply and absentmindedly poked away at his wife as she grew more and more frustrated and concerned about his inattention to her needs and desires. Finally, after several minutes of very uninspired passion, she sighed aloud, "look, honey, it's okay, I know you've got a lot on your mind; why don't you start thinking about your favorite fantasy, it's okay, just start thinking about screwing that special someone else...", at which point the contractor flipped his wife over on all fours and began just pounding away like a stallion as he pulled her hair back with one hand and began slapping her butt with his other free one, yelling at the top of his lungs "Okay, Mr. Johnson, you don't want to pay for those hidden conditions we found that were covered in Section 0200 in the General Conditions of the specifications, well, you listen to me, Mister, that's going to a be change order with 20% profit for labor figured at MCAA book rates and 20% profit for materials and another 5% for O&A and another charge of $300 a cubic yard for rock encountered and another $200 an hour for trackdozer rental..."
From: foehn (254.los-angeles-18.ca.dial-access.att.net)
Subject: the honest contractor...
A contractor dies on in a fishing accident on his 40th
birthday and
finds himself greeted at the Pearly Gates by a brass band.
Saint Peter
runs over, shakes his hand and says "Congratulations!"
"Congratulations for what?" asks the contractor.
"Congratulations for what?" says Saint Peter. "We are
celebrating the
fact that you lived to be 160 years old."
"But that's not true," says the consultant. "I only lived
to be forty."
"That's impossible," says Saint Peter, "we added up your
time sheets."
I'm not quite sure if this is a joke, or might possibly be for real...it's scary-funny in any event...
New Rest Room Policy
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES
FROM: HUMAN RESOURCES
DATE: SEPTEMBER 7, 1998
RE: REST ROOM USE POLICY
In the past, employees were permitted to make trips to the rest room under informal guidelines. Effective at the beginning of next month, a rest room trip policy will be established to provide a more consistent method of accounting for each employee rest room time and insuring equal treatment to all employees.
Under the policy, a "rest room trip bank" will be established for each employee. The first day of each month, employees will be given twenty (20) rest room credits. These credits may be accumulated.
Within two weeks, the entrance door to all rest rooms will be equipped with personal identification stations and computer linked voice print recognition devices. Before the end of the month, each employee must provide two copies of voice prints, one normal and one under stress, to the Human Resources Department. The voice print recognition stations will be operational but not restrictive for the first month. Employees should aquaint themselves with the station during this period.
If the employees rest room trip bank balance reaches zero, the doors to the rest rooms will not unlock for that employee's voice until the first of the next month. In addition, all rest rooms stalls are being equipped with timed paper roll retractors.
If the stall is occupied for more than three minutes, an alarm will sound. Thirty seconds after the alarm sounds the roll of paper will retract into the wall, the toilet will flush and the stall door will open. If the stall remains occupied, your picture will automatically be taken.
The picture will then be posted on the bulletin board. Anyone's picture showing up three times will be immediately terminated. If you have any questions about this policy please contact your supervisor. They have all received advanced instructions.
Thank you for your cooperation in this matter.
From: Patrick Ash
To: Multiple recipients of list HUMOR
Subject: Bubba as Carpenter
A contractor was building a group of houses, and one
morning was
watching as one of his employees put up siding. He noticed
the
man would take a nail and look at it, then would either use
it to
attach the siding, or just throw it over his shoulder onto
the
ground. He watched for a while, and this behavior
continued.
'Hey Bubba, what the hell are you doin?'
'Jimmy Ray, you got took when you bought these here nails.
Half
of them got the head on the wrong end.'
'Bubba, you big dip stick, those are for the back of the
house.'
Miscellaneous Jokes - CyberCheeze Joke #3567
Q: What's the difference between a contractor and a puppy?
A: The puppy will stop whining after about six weeks.
Submitted by: croc
Three contractors were visiting a tourist attraction on the
same day. One was from New York, another from Texas, and
the third from Florida.
At the end of the tour, the guard asked them what they did
for a living. When they all replied that they were
contractors, the guard said, "Hey, we need one of the rear
fences redone. Why don't you guys take a look at it and
give me a bid?" So, to the back fence they all went to
check it out.
First to step up was the Florida contractor. He took out
his tape measure and pencil, did some measuring and said,
"Well I figure the job will run about $900. $400 for
materials, $400 for my crew, and $100 profit for me."
Next was the Texas contractor. He also took out his tape
measure and pencil, did some quick figuring and said,
"Looks like I can do this job for $700. $300 for materials,
$300 for my crew, and $100 profit for me."
Without so much as moving, the New York contractor said,
"$2,700."
The guard, incredulous, looked at him and said, "You
didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come
up with such a high figure?"
"Easy," he said. "$1,000 for me, $1,000 for you and we
hire the guy from Texas."
Funny Sign
********
Biggs Septic Tank Service (near Nashville Tennessee) "Call Monday thru Friday, sorry, we haul milk on weekends."
-Anonymous
********
Q: Why is wrestling with a pig like arguing with a contractor?
A: Because after tangling for a while, you begin to realize the pig enjoys it!
...OR...
Q: Why is wrestling with a pig like arguing with a contractor?
A: Because after tangling for a while, you're both muddy and the pig enjoys it!
Q: How many contractors does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, because under Section 16000, Paragraph 3, Subsection 2.03.1 of the bulb's installation specifications, the Owner is to issue a separate contract for temporary lighting.
From: "Dan Griffin" dgriff1@nospam.net
To: kent@hkentcraig.com
Subject: Plumbers
Date: Sat, 5 Dec 1998 14:42:59 -0600
I never could understand why plumbers made so much money. They get more per hour for service calls than any other trade. It is even more incredible when you find out that a plumber only needs to know seven things.
Do you know the seven things?
1) Hot's on the left
2) Cold's on the right
3) Farts go up
4) Shit goes down
5) Payday's on Friday
6) The boss is an SOB
7) Don't chew your fingernails
Keep the whole world singing.
The Barbershop Bass
Dan & Dee
Q: How many project managers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, because that's what the miscellaneous job expense category in the budget is there for...also, project managers don't do field work.
Supplies
An Italian, and Irishman and a Chinese fellow are hired at a construction site. The foreman points out a huge pile of sand and says to the Italian guy, "You're in charge of sweeping", To the Irishman he says "You're in charge of shoveling." And to the Chinese guy, "you're in charge of supplies".
He then says "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a dent in that there pile."
So the foreman goes away for a couple hours, and when he returns, the pile of sand is untouched. He says to the Italian, "Why didn't you sweep any of it?"
The Italian replies in a heavy accent, "I didn't have a broom. You said the Chinese a guy was in a charge of supplies, but he a disappeared and I couldn't a find a him."
Then the foreman turns to the Irishman and asks why he didn't shovel.
The Irishman replies in his heavy brogue, "Aye, ye did lad. But I counna get meself a shovel. Ye left the chinese guy in chairge of supplies, but I counna fin' him."
The foreman is really angry now, and storms off toward the pile of sand looking for the Chinese guy... Just then, the Chinese guy springs out from behind the pile of sand and yells....
"SUPPLIES!"
Group: alt.discuss.mod.internet Date: Wed, Aug 26, 1998, 6:57pm (EDT-3) From: drclull@tv.net (Doc L) The Italian, the Mexican and the Redneck
The Italian, the Mexican and the Redneck
Three construction workers (an Italian, a Mexican, and a Redneck) were sitting on a steel beam at the top of a skyscraper they were building. It was lunchtime. The Italian worker opens his lunch box and sees that he has spaghetti and meatballs.
"Son of a bitch", he says, "spaghetti and meatballs again. Everyday it's spaghetti and meatballs. I swear if I get spaghetti and meatballs again tomorrow I'm going to commit suicide by jumping off this building".
The Mexican worker opens up his lunch box and sees a burrito. "Damnit", he says, "another damn burrito, I'm so tired of burritos, If I have to eat a burrito again tomorrow I'm going to jump off of this building
and commit suicide".
The Redneck worker opens his lunch box and sees a bologna sandwich. "Shit!!!, another damn bologna sandwich. If I get another bologna sandwich tomorrow, I'm going to commit suicide".
The next day during lunch hour, they are sitting on the same steel beam. The
Italian worker opens his lunch box and finds spaghetti and meatballs. Without saying a word he closes the box and throws himself off of the beam and drops twenty floors to his death.
The Mexican worker opens his box, finds a burrito, closes the box and falls
to his death. The Redneck worker opens his box and finds a bologna sandwich,
closes the box and jumps to his death.
A couple of days later the families of all three workers meet at the cemetery just after the funerals. The Italian worker's wife was crying.
"Oh, if only I had known how he felt about the spaghetti and meatballs, I could have fixed him a muffalotta, and he would still be here today.
The Mexican worker's wife said "I could have fixed my husband a taco or an enchilada, and he would be here with me today".
There was a moment of silence while everybody was waiting for the Redneck worker's wife to comment.
"Don't look at me", she said, "He fixes his own lunch".
A tarmac contractor walks into a bar with a lump of tarmac under his arm.
"A beer please" he asks the barman " and one for the road"
Jim Cook- UK
hope this makes sense in US
-------------------------------------------
Re-write for those hopelessly American:
A paving contractor walks into a bar with a lump of asphalt under his arm.
"A beer please" he asks the barman " and one for the road"
To: "'kent@hkentcraig.com'"
Subject: contractor joke
Date: Fri, 14 Aug 1998 11:57:10 -0600
C*******@N*****Supply.com
[Better not use my name, sir. I'm supposed to be working. This joke is more tuned to wholesalers than plumbers, in that everything we send out to a jobsight is either busted or lost. We also joke that a plumber could break a bowling ball with a feather, smash an anvil with a rubber hammer, etc. etc. My father and grandfather are both plumbers so I have grown up appreciating the humor you are sharing here. Thanks!!!!]
You crack me up. Here's one I hope you can use.
------------------------------------
An international design group decided to see what
country could produce
the most ingenious product using only two solid steel
balls, each three
feet in diameter as material. They chose three groups.
A group of
Japanese engineers, a group of German machinists, and a
group of
American plumbers. Each group was locked in a huge
aircraft hangar for
two weeks. The hangars contained all the equipment
necessary to build
anything the groups desired in a two week period.
The
designers opened
the door to the Japanese hangar after the two weeks had
passed and there
sat a two stroke motor scooter, running and ready to
go.
They excitedly
opened the German machinist hangar door. There sat a
completely
functional 20mm cannon, with ammunition.
They anxiously
pulled the
plumbers door open. The plumbers all sat in the middle
of the hangar,
looking at one of the steel balls which was broken
clean in two. The
designers asked why they didn't just use the other
ball. "We can't find
it," answered the plumbing foreman.
Q: How many senior estimators does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One senior estimator man-labor-unit at a 1.00 multiplier x .70 labor efficiency factor + .10 height hazard factor - .005 regular time allowance + .075 allowance for benefits package x .01453 live electrical hotwork risk factor - .35 non-hourly salaried scale adjustment + .0066 for Band-Aids after he drops and breaks and tries to pick up the broken pieces of the old bulb with his bare hands + .125 workmen's compensation insurance increase for use of Builder's Risk insurance - .0008 adjustment for non-compensated use of personal car when he drives himself to the nearest Emergency Care clinic x 1.133 mulitplier of total increased overall office efficiency for one day because he's not distracting everyone else there with boring fishing stories or complaining about that it's too hot or too cold etc.
Knock~Knock Joke
*Knock, knock...
*Who's there?...
*Ben D'offah
*Ben D'offah who?
*Ben D'offah & Grabur Ahnkeels Construction Co. Ltd, we're hear to give you the estimate you wanted for remodeling your bathroom...
Checking Meters
Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter.
Finishing the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger co-worker to a footrace down the alley back to the truck, to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one.
As they came running up to the truck, they realized the lady from that last house was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped and asked her what was wrong.
Gasping for breath, she replied, "When I see two gas men running as hard as you two were, I figured I'd better run too!"
From: boilerguy@spammerssuck.net (Scott Betts)
Date: Sat, 10 Oct 1998 10:59:32 -0500 (CDT)
To: hkentcraig@hotmail.com
Subject: The Plan
Here's one that an ex-Navy buddy of mine emailed me today. I think it is destined to be a classic.
-sb
----------------------------------------------------------
In the beginning was the Plan.
And the Plan was without substance.
And then came the Assumptions.
And the Assumptions were without form.
And darkness was upon the face of the Workers. And they spoke among themselves, saying, "It is a crock of shit, and it stinks."
And the Workers went unto their Supervisors and said, "It is a pail of dung, and we can't live with the smell."
And the supervisors went unto their Managers, saying, "It is a container of excrement, and it is very strong, such that none may abide by it." And the Managers went unto their Directors, saying, "It is a vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its strength."
And the Directors spoke among themselves, saying to one another, "It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong." And the Directors went to the Vice Presidents, saying unto them, "It promotes growth, and it is very powerful."
And the Vice Presidents went to the President, saying unto him, "This new plan will actively promote the growth and vigour of the company with very powerful effects."
And the President looked upon the Plan and declared that it was good.
And the Plan became Policy.
*
And this is how Shit happens...
PAYING BY THE HOUR...
A plumber was called to woman's apartment in New York to repair a leaking pipe. When he arrived he was pleased to discover that the woman was quite beautiful and during the course of the afternoon the two became extremely friendly. About 5.30 p.m. the phone rang, disturbing the bedroom shenanigans.
"That was my husband," she said, putting down the phone.
"He's on his way home, but is going back to the office around 8. Come back then, dear, and we can take up where we left off."
The union plumber looked at the woman in disbelief. "What? On my own time??"
From: Larry Collins
The Nunnery
A young lady went to the convent to become a nun. As she was sitting outside one day, studying, she overheard the language being used by some construction workers who were building a new playground for the orphanage.
She became so upset, she ran into the mother superior's office, crying. The older nun tried to sooth her, saying,"Now dear child, don't be upset by this, they are just good, godfearing men, they simply call a spade, a spade".
"No they don't.....(sniff).....They call it a fuckin'
SHOVEL".
Q: Who was the world's first electrician?
A: Noah...because he made an arc lighter (groan, Smile).
Mr. Craig,
Maybe you've heard this one. How can you tell the difference between a
plumber and a fitter?
Put them in a vat of shit up to their necks. Swing at their heads with a baseball bat. The plumber will duck....
Date: Fri, 14 Aug 1998 01:06:23 -0400
From: David and Amy Buchsbaum
Did you hear about the contractor who won a million dollars in the
lottery?
When asked what he was going to do with his new fortune, he replied "I'm going to continue being a contractor until the money runs out"
Group: alt.mining.recreational Date: Sun, Nov 15, 1998,
9:58am (EST-4) From: rsmfp@alaska.edu
(Mr. and Mrs. G. Gruff) Dangers of Bread...(fwd)
This is absolutely WONDERFUL
=-o=-o=-o=-o=-o=-o=-o=-o=-o=-o=-o=-o
A recent Cincinnati Enquirer headline read, "Smell of baked bread may be health hazard." The article went on to describe the dangers of the smell of baking bread. The main danger, apparently, is that the organic components of this aroma may break down ozone (I'm not making this stuff up).
I was horrified. When are we going to do something about bread-induced global warming? Sure, we attack tobacco companies, but when is the government going to go after Big Bread?
Well, I've done a little research, and what I've discovered should make anyone think twice....
1: More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread eaters.
2: Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.
3: In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever and influenza ravaged whole nations.
4: More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread.
5: Bread is made from a substance called "dough." It has been proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to suffocate a mouse. The average American eats more bread than that in one month!
6: Primitive tribal societies that have no bread exhibit a low occurrence of cancer, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's disease and osteoporosis.
7: Bread has been proven to be addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water to eat begged for bread after only two days.
8: Bread is often a "gateway" food item, leading the user to "harder" items such as butter, jelly, peanut butter and even cold cuts.
9: Bread has been proven to absorb water. Since the human body is more than 90 percent water, it follows that eating bread could lead to your body being taken over by this absorptive food product, turning you into a soggy, gooey bread-pudding person.
10: Newborn babies can choke on bread.
11: Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 400 degrees Fahrenheit! That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute.
12: Most American bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling.
In light of these frightening statistics, we propose the following bread restrictions:
1: No sale of bread to minors.
2: No advertising of bread within 1000 feet of a school.
3: A 300 percent federal tax on all bread to pay for all the societal ills we might associate with bread.
4: No animal or human images, nor any primary colors (which may appeal to children) may be used to promote bread usage.
5: A $4.2 zillion fine on the three biggest bread manufacturers.
Please send this e-mail on to everyone you know who cares about this crucial issue.
Remember: Think globally, act idiotically.
From: Jackie Holman
To: kent@hkentcraig.com
Subject: Two Oldies From My Office Wall
Date: Thu, 5 Nov 1998 11:07:09 -0500
Enjoyed your humor page - it sure beat worring about my deadline for preliminary design... Thought you might enjoy these oldies from my office wall:
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Six Phases of a Construction Project
Phase #1: Enthusiasm
Phase #2: Disillusionment
Phase #3: Panic
Phase #4: Search for the Guilty
Phase #5: Persecution of the Innocent
Phase #6: Praise & Honors for the Non-Participants
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Union Rules
A couple buys a co-op in the Trump Tower in Manhattan, and the lady of the house decides to call a plumber about replacing the ordinary white commode in her master bathroom with something a little more fancier, an new antique-looking high-tank one like she saw in "Architectural Digest".
The youngish-appearing master plumber who just so happens to be a near twin of Brad Pitt chit-chats with her a while, showing her various catalog sheets from different manufacturers, and she chooses a fancy one, with gold trim and a hand-polished teakwood seat. Adding the figures on the estimate up, he hands her a proposal to replace the old one with the new fancy commode for $3,000.00
"$3,000.00!!!..." she exclaims "...even for New York City, that's outrageous!"
"Look, lady..." he tries to explain "...a lot that relates to union rules...one plumber has to get the commode from the plumbing supply house and nothing else, another has to bring it up the elevator and do no other job during the job, another one has to be here just to uncrate and stand around until the job is through, another one puts the tank and bowl together for me, another one disconnects and removes the old one and that's it, and I, I being the master plumber on the job, my sole job is to actually install the new one for you, once the other guys have done their jobs."
"Well, I guess that makes sense, go ahead, I'll sign for it."
The next day the master plumber and his crew arrive to install it, and sure enough, one guy brings her new commode up, another uncrates it, another puts it together, etc., all standing around doing nothing until their turn to do something. As the last guy is cleaning up the mess in the bathroom, the lady just can't help herself any longer, and asks the Brad Pitt-twin master plumber if he'd like to go back to her bedroom and have some fun on company time, he readily agreeing with a grin.
As they smoochwalk to her bed, she notices his crew trailing behind him. Protesting, she asks him what the hell is going on.
"Oh, you know, union rules...one plumber undresses you, another strips me, one to get you wet for me, another to get me hard, another to put on a condom, etc., so I, I can actually be the one to finish the job."
Did you hear about little Jimmy?
Little Jimmy is four years old. One day he was getting on his Mother's nerves, so she suggested that he go outside and watch the builders working on the new house across the street.
Little Jimmy was gone for about two hours. His Mother asked him what he had learned from the builders.
Little Jimmy replied, "Well first you put the G** damned door up, then the son of a bitch don't fit right. So you have to take the c**ks**ker back down again and take a c**t hair off each side and put the m***erf**ker back up again!"
Little Jimmy's Mother was shocked! "You just wait till your Father gets home! Now go to your room."
When Jimmy's Father got home, his Mother told him to ask his son what he had learned today. Once again, Little Jimmy told his story.
His Father told him to go outside and get a switch.
"F**k you! That's the damned electrician's job!" replied Little Jimmy.